Karma
by gleechild
Summary: What if things happened differently when Nate came to ask Blair to the ball? More than one person is going to get what they deserve. But who will it be? xoxo Gossip Girl! ch3:violence ch5:Mrated
1. Chapter 1

He waited impatiently for the elevator to reach her floor. After debating with himself—and not taking Chuck's advice—he decided to go see Blair. He couldn't stop thinking about her. He never thought he'd miss her this much either. He didn't know if she'd be willing to give them another chance, but he was going to start slow and try to work his way back into her good graces. He figured the Debutante Ball would be the perfect starting place.

The elevator finally arrived with a ding. The doors opened to reveal Dorota, the Waldorf maid, dusting. She looked at him on his arrival and frowned.

"Good afternoon Dorota, I've come to see Blair," he smiled his charming grin at her.

"Missus Blair is not receiving guests at the moment, Monsieur Nate. You'll have to come back another time," Dorota said, looking worriedly at the top of the stairs.

"She told you to say that right, if I showed up? I really need to see her," he started for the stairs.

"Monsieur Nate!" Dorota whispered loudly, hoping to make him stop.

"I won't tell her you let me up," he grinned back at her, still walking up the stairs.

Dorota stopped at the bottom of the stairs, afraid to see what would happen next.

Nate walked faster up the stairs and was nearly to the top when he froze. He heard Blair shout "Yes!" very loudly in a tone he'd never heard her use. There were other noises, more muffled, coming from the room too. He looked back down the stairs at Dorota who looked a little pale. She looked at him sadly and shook her head before turning and walking away.

He looked back up and took a few more steps towards the top landing unable to entertain the idea that was starting to form in his head. As he drew closer to the room the sounds he heard amplified. He could hear the pounding of a mattress and Blair moaning in ecstasy. He froze again when he heard the unmistakable sound of male groans accompanying her shouts.

Nate couldn't breathe or think for a moment. He felt this odd swelling, almost pain, in his chest. He closed his eyes tight and almost burst into the room. But he didn't.

Instead he turned quickly and ran down the stairs and got on the elevator. As the doors slid shut, he spotted Dorota giving him a pitying look—that only made it worse because he knew this was his fault.

* * *

When he got to the sidewalk, he didn't know what to do with himself. He walked in a full circle before he realized that he needed a destination. He decided his home would be the best place. He began the long walk home with his thoughts running a mile a minute.

She had moved on. He knew she was allowed to, he just never thought that she would…at least not this quickly. He could still feel this weird swelling in his chest and wished it would go away. He finally realized that he needed to remember to breathe.

Part of him was mad at himself for not realizing what a good thing he had before he let it go. Part of him was insanely jealous of the guy with Blair and wanted to tear his head off. Part of him wanted her to be happy; and, if this guy made her feel all the things that Nate couldn't give her, then Nate should be happy for both of them.

The part of him that he needed to deal with but could barely face was the part that was angry at Blair. He couldn't believe that they had been together practically their entire lives and in a few weeks apart she would give up the one thing she kept so sacred to some other guy!

Even if he got her back now he would always remember that he should have been her first—and he wasn't. That was tearing him up. It made him question everything he knew about Blair. He almost wondered if she had been playing him but stopped the thought before his imagination could run wild with it.

Blair had always been faithful. She had shown each and every day how much she truly loved him. She would never betray him—especially not the way he had betrayed her.

With a deep breath, he could finally see things more clearly. His first time was supposed to be with her too—and it wasn't. He was a hypocrite. He was judging her and he had no right. It was kind of poetic justice in a way.

He stopped walking. So they weren't virgins anymore. Who gives a crap? That's not what's important. What's important is how he feels about her and how she feels about him.

He turned and started walking back towards her place. Hopefully the guy would be gone and he could do what he went there to do in the first place—ask her to the ball.

Some things may have changed, but others stayed the same. He was going to win her back. He had to. Otherwise he'd really have to kick himself for realizing too late how much he loves her.

* * *

This time when the elevator doors opened Dorota was nowhere to be seen. He walked inside and went to the stairs, pausing to listen. When he didn't hear anything he started up the stairs. He looked at the door to her room and realized it was open about halfway and she was sitting at her vanity in a towel. She was bent forward with her hair dripping wet hanging down around her face.

As he finished his walk up the stairs and arrived at her door, she put another towel over her head and began to towel dry her hair. She wouldn't rush through it for fear of damaging her luscious locks. He pushed the half open door to make a wider space. It swung with a slight squeak.

She didn't even look up from what she was doing. He opened his mouth to make his presence known but he didn't get the chance to speak.

"It's by the door. Honestly, you need to stop leaving your things here," she snapped.

He looked to the small lamp stand to the left of the door and found himself frozen in place again, this time for an entirely different reason.

"If one of the girls saw that" she was referring to Isabel and Kati, "Nate _will_ find out."

She's just finishing up towel drying her hair. She senses that he's still standing there. She drops the towel and picks up the blow dryer, still not looking at him—almost like she can't stand the thought of looking at him.

"Leave. I'll see you tonight after dinner with Serena—I told you that. I'm running late because of you. A shower! Do you know how long it's going to take to get my hair straight?" with an exasperated 'humph!' she flipped the switch on the blow dryer and began drying and brushing her hair.

His eyes hovered on her before swinging back to the lamp stand. He was back to being breathless, but this time the anger far out-weighed the pain. He took a deep breath.

Then picked the colorful scarf up and briskly turned and walked out without a backward glance.


	2. Chapter 2

He entered the Palace and went straight up to Chuck's room. He pounded on the door, but there was no answer. Resigned, Nate went back down to the front desk.

"Is Chuck Bass in his room?" He probably should have asked when he first got to the hotel but he wasn't exactly thinking straight right now.

The front desk attendant looked at the computer screen.

"No, he is not. You can wait over there if you'd like," the man said, nodding towards a sitting area.

"Uh, I'll be in at the bar. Let him know where he can find me when he gets in," Nate said. He could really use a drink right about now. He wasn't going to get drunk. He just needed something to take the edge off so he could think.

"Very good, sir," the man nodded.

Nate walked in and ordered a scotch. He didn't know how long he'd have to wait, but he figured Chuck had to show up some time. He couldn't call him. This was just something he had to do in person.

He knew what he _wanted_ to do when Chuck showed up. He wanted to beat the shit out of him. Now he just had to convince himself why that wouldn't be a good thing to do.

* * *

He was working on his fourth drink two hours later when Chuck finally appeared next to him.

"Nathaniel, what can I do for you?" Chuck said with a slow smirk. Nate never realized how much he hated that smirk until this very moment.

"I needed to talk to you," Nate explained, "Let's go up." He stood up and started towards the exit. He didn't want to do this in front of witnesses. Blair had been hurt enough; he didn't need her reputation going up in flames if that stupid gossip girl got a hold of this info.

"Lead the way," Chuck said looking at him peculiar-like. Nate seemed a little abrupt. Chuck followed him and they got into the elevator together.

Nate glanced at Chuck then looked at the numbers above the elevator door waiting for it to get to Chuck's floor.

"So, where's your signature scarf? I didn't think you left home without it these days," Nate asked Chuck.

Chuck automatically moved his hands up to where the scarf should be. He thought about it for a minute and he grinned, "Oh, I'm sure I'll be retrieving it soon."

Nate shifted uncomfortably, but said nothing else. Inside he was quivering, hating that self-satisfied smirk on his face even more. He just had to contain himself for a few more minutes. Enough time to get him alone and make him pay for what he's doing to Blair.

Chuck just looked at him oddly.

Finally the elevator dinged on their floor. They walked into the room and Nate went straight to the bar while Chuck began taking his coat off. Nate found that the scotch was helping him maintain some control over his inner rage.

"So Nathaniel how's the captain? Any change?" Chuck asked thinking this was why Nathaniel was here.

"He's, uh, okay. Nothing's changed." Nate didn't want to think about his dad right now. If his dad hadn't pulled this crap, he wouldn't have lost sight of Blair to begin with.

Chuck shrugged and walked over to the bar. He mixed his own drink and took a sip.

"Nathaniel, I know you're here for some reason. So dish. What's on your mind?" Chuck lounged back in a chair, lolling his head to the side.

"I didn't listen to you about Blair," Nate said, looking down into his drink.

Chuck's head snapped up and looked at Nate. "What do you mean?"

"I decided to go ask her if she wanted to go to the ball with me," Nate explained quietly. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about." Nate started reaching his hand under his blazer to the back of his pants where he had a certain length of material in his waistband—safely hidden until this moment.

"Nathaniel, we had this discussion before—you don't miss her—" Chuck was interrupted by a knock on the door.

Chuck's head swiveled to look at the door and Nate swore Chuck almost looked pale.

"Expecting someone?" Nate asked already knowing the answer. Blair told him, thinking he was Chuck, that she was coming by after dinner with Serena. Guess that's why Chuck didn't come back to the hotel until now. How ironic—perfect timing on his part. It was finally Nate's turn to smirk at Chuck.

"Uh. Yes. Don't worry though, I'll send them on their way," Chuck walked quickly to the door. He opened it enough to squeeze through and closed it shut with a small bang.

"Chuck?" Blair looked at him confused.

"Come back later Blair," Chuck said.

Blair gave him a haughty look, "I can't. Serena's my excuse to be here. If I leave and come back it'll look weird. You know I don't want _anyone_ to know about this."

"And _you_ know I don't want Nate to know. He's here now," he nodded his head toward his room.

"Oh really?" she said with a smirk.

"He needed a _friend_," he stressed the last word.

Blair shook her head bemused, "I guess I can go back up to Serena's for a while. She won't mind. Just text me when you get rid of him."

She turns and starts towards the elevator.

"I plan to," he said with a lecherous grin while checking out her backside. He shook himself out of his admiration and turned to go back into his room. His hand was on the handle when he remembered something. He turned back around.

"Oh, and Blair? Did I leave my scarf at your place?" he asked. She paused and looked back at him.

"Uh, yeah? You came back for it," she rolled her eyes at him and kept walking.

"No, I didn't," Chuck denied.

"Yes, you did," Blair turned back to look at him like he was crazy, "I was drying my hair, you walked in. I told you where it was at and you took it and left. It was hours ago. Are you feeling okay?"

"Blair, I'm telling you I didn't come back for the scarf. I didn't even notice it was missing until Nate—oh fuck," Chuck rolled his head around and put his hand to his neck.

"What?" Blair said, not understanding what the hell was going on.

"He knows," Chuck said, looking skyward.

"Who know what?" Blair was going to smack him if he didn't start making sense.

"Nathaniel, he knows about us," Chuck looked at her.

"What? How?"

"He was waiting for me. He said he had to talk to me about something and he's been really quiet. He said he went to your apartment to talk—it must've been him you spoke to. Damn it! This is not good," Chuck was getting agitated. He needed Nathaniel. He needed Blair. He had a sinking feeling about going back into his room.

"Would you calm down? This is not quite the crisis situation you envision. We broke up! He doesn't love me. He doesn't want me. He moved on; I moved on. He'll deal with it," Blair was starting to look extremely aggravated.

"You don't understand," Chuck said. And how could he make her understand? How could he tell her all the times that he's told Nate to just "be done with" Blair if he was done? How could he tell her he tried everything he could to stop them from getting back together after their night in the limo? How could he tell her the very words he said to Nate this morning when Nate insisted that he missed her? He couldn't tell her. He couldn't tell her that he was insecure and was pretty sure she'd jump at the chance to have Nate back.

Blair sighs, "Let's just get this over with." She pushed past him and grabbed the door handle.

"Wait!" Chuck lunged and grabbed her arm. "Blair, let me do this."

"What are you talking about? He can't possibly be angry. He threw me away. What does it matter who picks me out of the trash?" Blair was glaring at him.

"Damn it Blair, listen! This isn't about Nate and _you_. This is about Nate and _me_," Chuck said through clenched teeth. "For once, will you just listen to me? If he was angry at you he would have said something at your place. He's pissed alright, but it has nothing to do with you moving on. It has to do with who you moved on _to_!" Chuck was glaring at her now.

She rolled her eyes, "Fine." She spread her arms out showing she was backing off. "Deal with him. I'm all of a sudden feeling tired. I think I will go home after all." She marched off to the elevator again. He just stood and watched her while she entered and turned to face him. She smirked and waved a hand. "Have fun," She called as the doors slid closed and left him alone in the hall.

Chuck sighed and braced himself. He thrives on drama and scandal—except when it involved him losing the ones he cares most about. He opened his room door and slid back inside, closing the door quickly before turning with his head down and leaning against the door.

After a few moments of silence, Chuck finally looked up straight into Nate's accusing eyes. He had the damn scarf dangling from his fingers. He let it fall to the floor. Chuck glanced down at it.

"Guess where I found this?" Nate spoke with barely repressed anger in his voice.

Chuck rolled his head to the side, wincing before looking back to Nate. Suddenly he wished very badly that he had let Blair handle this for him.


	3. Chapter 3

"Guess where I found this?" Nate said with barely repressed rage as he dropped the scarf.

Chuck glanced down at it, then back up at Nate. Deciding that maybe Nate didn't know all the facts, he lied.

"Oh, I know where. I stopped by Blair's to, uh, see where her head is at concerning you. I must've just forgotten it. Thanks for—," Chuck began walking towards the bar.

"And you just keep on lying!" Nate growled as he slammed his glass down and got up. "Do you really think I'm that big of a fool?" He starts to approach Chuck. "All morning I talked to you about Blair," he rolled his eyes, "and you just lied!"

Chuck backed up a little, "Relax Nate! You broke up with her. I don't see where there's a problem." He was lying again. It's a cardinal rule: never date your best friend's ex. He hadn't ever had to put that rule to the test though—Nate only ever _had_ one girlfriend. He guessed he kind of failed.

"If you didn't think there was a problem, why didn't you tell me?" Nate asked, anger making him clench his teeth.

Chuck was at a loss for words. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out.

"That's what I thought," Nate rushed him and shoved him hard into the wall. Chuck groaned when his head hit the wood paneling. "Shit, man, I don't want to fight you," Chuck said. He tried, unsuccessfully, to push Nate off of him.

Nate pulls his right arm back and swings hard. In doing so, he lets go of Chuck who is able to move his head out of the way at the last minute. Nate was off balanced enough that Chuck broke free and now stood in the middle of the entryway facing Nate.

"What would make you think _you're_ good enough for her?" Nate was advancing on him again.

Chuck held his arms out in surrender, "Look, Nathaniel, let me explain." He said in a smooth coaxing voice while backing up again. He accidentally walks into the couch; it startled him, making him look back at it.

That was all Nate needed. Nate threw his right fist straight at him, catching the corner of Chuck's right eye when he looked back up at Nate.

Pain, like the kind Dan Humphrey last inflicted on him, shot through his face and the momentum of the hit made him stumble back into the couch and fall backwards over the arm.

He hit the couch and fell onto the floor. As soon as he hit the carpet, he sprang back up. "Shit Nate!" Chuck knew he deserved that hit; he just hadn't been looking forward to it.

He turned to face Nate.

"How are you going to explain this away?" Nate's was the face of betrayal and it was getting more and more in Chuck's face as he spoke. "Oh, I didn't mean to do it, Nate… or, I know, how about, she just fell on my dick, Nate!" He was shouting at him now.

Chuck began, "I—," He was interrupted by a right hook from Nate that slammed into the side of his mouth. His head snapped back, he felt the skin on his lip split and suddenly Chuck was done with trying to make nice. He tasted blood. That shit fucking hurt.

Pissed now, Chuck starts laughing, "Man, you have no idea what you're missing." He hauls off and slams his right fist upwards catching Nate under the chin. Nate is surprised at the blow and stumbles backwards, off-balance again.

Chuck spits out some blood and started taunting Nate. "You ever hear the perfect Blair Waldorf beg for anything in her life? I have. She wraps her legs around me and just begs for more."

Nate growled and rushed him, shoving Chuck into the bar. Chuck's still laughing even though it hurts like hell. Chuck's struggling to grab Nate's hands so he can't throw anymore punches. "I've taught her so well. You should hear her purr like a kitten when she's satisfied."

Nate slips one of his hands free and punches him in the gut. Chuck doubles over, moaning at the pain. He doesn't even see the next hit coming. Nate brings his knee up and slams him in the nose. Chuck is flung back up, clutching his nose. He can't defend himself at all when Nate shoves him into the counter again and brings his knee up straight in between Chuck's legs.

Chuck groans and grabs himself, sinking to the floor. Nate leans down over him, grabbing the lapels of his suit jacket to pull him up, "How could you take advantage of _her_?" Guilt was eating at Nate's gut. He broke up with her and left her vulnerable to… to… this! He let go of the lapels, flinging Chuck back down to the floor. "You son of a bitch!" He cursed as he stood up and started pacing.

"I keep seeing you with woman after woman in my head. I know how you treat them Chuck—Blair? God, why Blair!?" He kicked the coffee table over. Nate wanted to hit him again but Chuck was already down for the count. He needed to calm down. It was hard.

"I'm going to fix this," his words were eerily reminiscent of Blair's morning after reaction which caused Chuck's stomach to clench instead of flutter. He was sickened at the thought of what was going to happen if Nate wanted Blair back.

Chuck tried and managed to get into a sitting position—barely. "Nate, listen to me," he sputtered.

"You make me sick. We're done Chuck," Nate looked down at him in disgust.

Chuck winces—the look was just like the one his father gave him everything time he was disappointed in him. He really didn't need another person making him feel worthless—he already knew he was.

"Dude, look at you and Serena," Chuck tried to make him see reason. "You cheated on Blair. I don't think that makes you much better than me." Nate glared at him again.

"With Blair, it's different. I'm different. I haven't been with anyone else since her. I don't want anyone else. I know," Chuck shakes his head, "it's hard to believe, but you've got to." Chuck was really struggling to get the words out, he hurt all over and that wasn't making this discussion any easier.

Nate looked at his supposed best friend in disbelief. "Or, what? I should believe you or what? Why would I believe _you_?" He snorted. Chuck's been doing nothing but lying to him for who knows how long!

"Why should you? Even she doesn't," Chuck said, "But it doesn't matter. She's with me now. Don't you get it? Move on," even down and out Chuck can manage a smirky sassy tone.

"Screw you Chuck. Blair's always been mine, and she always will be. I know her. All I have to do is go and apologize and she'll take me back. You know it, and I know it," Nate sneered. "That's why you said nothing this morning. You knew you wouldn't have a chance in hell if she had to choose between you and me."

Nate was furious. Did Chuck really think _he_ was going to admit defeat and let her go…to Chuck? Thoughts from earlier sprang forward. He did want Blair to be happy with the guy she was with…but only if he _made_ her happy. Chuck was an embarrassment, a pervert. Blair wouldn't be caught in public with him. Chuck would never make Blair happy.

Flashes of Blair smiling at him, kissing him, doing everything to make him happy, and always—_always_—being there for him swam before Nate's eyes. He was such an idiot!

Chuck swung his gaze upwards to Nate and tried to stand up, "Nate," he needed to make him stop.

"No," Nate snapped at him, "I mean it Chuck, we're done. And so are you and Blair."

Nate walked back over to the bar and picked up his glass to gulp down the remainder of his scotch. Slamming the glass onto the bar again, he looked down at Chuck. "Don't look at me, don't talk to me, and _don't_," he said dangerously, "go near Blair again."

With that Nate turned and walked out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him.

Cursing athletes and his lack of athletic ability—namely in boxing, Chuck stumbled to his feet into one of the high chairs. He snatched up a towel and put a handful of ice cubes into it to apply to his face. He sucked on some ice chips to try to numb the pain in his mouth.

He was in pain, ticked off, and worried. Nate was right. He didn't think Blair would choose him. He might as well admit defeat now. It was going to be really hard though. Chuck hadn't lied to Nate. Things were different with Blair. He had to admit the crazy unbelievable truth to himself even if he could never admit it to anyone else.

Wincing as he slid out of his chair and headed to take a long hot bath, he cursed again and thought, _This love shit sucks._


	4. Chapter 4

There was a bee in his ear. He swatted at it. It buzzed again. He slapped his ear this time and lifted his head in frustration.

Looking down at the bed, he cursed. His cell phone was vibrating from a damn text message. It stopped and he flopped back down, not even bothering with the thing.

He didn't want to think about last night but the pain pulsating through his body just by the act of lifting his head brought the images back in startling clarity.

After Nate left he had stumbled into his luxury bathroom. He managed to get through a bath and clean up his face well enough. He knew that the area around the top of his nose and his right eye were going to be darker than death tomorrow. His lip was bruised too. He laughed mockingly to himself. He might as well call Jessica now and tell her he couldn't take her to the ball. If he showed up looking like this she'd kill him.

…which he might actually welcome after last night. And his damn phone won't stop vibrating! He didn't even move this time, just waited for the stupid thing to shut up. He knew that it would keep going until he responded; he told his hand to move but it wasn't cooperating.

Last night, when he finally stumbled out of the bathroom in the first pair of pinstriped pajamas he could find, he found his phone and tumbled onto his bed. He started looking through the thing for Jessica's number. He paused when he came to Blair's. He knew he should probably call her so she knew what happened with Nate. He sighed and pulled the covers over himself. He was going over what he was going to tell her when the weariness took over and he fell asleep.

Buzz. Sighing, Chuck turned his head to look at the digits on his alarm clock. _8am? Who woke up at 8am on a Saturday?_

He reached and finally managed to pick the thing up. He flipped through and saw that he had ten missed calls and two text messages. He moved his thumb to browse through the missed calls first. They were all from Blair. He really didn't feel like talking to her right now. He read the text messages.

**wake up Bass**

Then the next one:

**i need 2 talk. come here now**

Sighing, he hit the Reply button and sent her a message of his own.

**later**

He turned the phone off and tossed it to the floor. He wasn't going anywhere just yet. He especially wasn't going to crawl out of bed before he was ready just to hear her say she was with Nate again. He punched his pillow and dropped his head face first into the pillow. Within minutes he was asleep.

* * *

In reality, Blair was awake because she had received a disturbing call from Prince Theodore. Some emergency back in his country and he was on a plane to deal with it.

Her debut was not going to be perfect after all! She needed a date, complete with tux, and she needed him now!

Her mother wasn't home, of course, and she needed help to think of available guys. All the ones she knew were already going with someone. Knowing that Chuck had a lot of friends who would suit up for this event, she had been trying all morning to get a hold of him.

She thought she might have heard from him last night to find out what happened with Nate but he hadn't called. She had gone to bed instead, just like she told him she would.

Buzz. Beep.

She looked at her cell. _Finally!_ She thought. She looked at the new message.

**later**

_Great!_ She thought, _Just great!_ She's having a crisis and he can't be bothered.

She took a deep calming breath. As she let it out she told herself that everything would work out. Whenever things like this happen Chuck finds a way to fix it. He may not do it the best way possible, but at least he tries. He would think of someone immediately and that person wouldn't dare turn down the chance to escort Blair Cornelia Waldorf to her debut.

If only he would come over _now_ so she could stop worrying about it.

She went upstairs to get dressed. She had too many things to do to prepare for Cece's tea today and not enough time. After what happened with Nate, she really wished she hadn't dropped Jenny like a hot potato—an errand girl was still an errand girl.

Hopefully Chuck showed up for his "later" before eleven. Otherwise she would have to get CeCe to find someone for her. She didn't like CeCe. She was nice enough. But Blair couldn't afford the chance that CeCe had some hidden agenda. She knew how society worked: anything to get your family ahead…and make your granddaughter shine.

* * *

"Blair, pray tell did I hear correctly? Prince Theodore rushed off with a, dare I say, palace emergency?" CeCe inquired.

Cursing inwardly that the news had come out so quickly, and the fact that she managed to be caught alone with CeCe with the news, she maintained her smile and began to speak.

"Yes, you heard right," she managed. She was trying to pretend that she wasn't freaking out inside.

_Damn it Bass,_ she thought, _where are you?_

"But you have found another escort, have you not?" CeCe asked with her fake smile.

"Well, not at the moment, but I'm sure someone will just pop out of the woodwork at any moment." She hated admitting that she had no date to this woman, but what else could she say?

Ding. The elevator's arrival sounded through the first floor. The tea party had been going on for two hours now; in fact, they figured everyone would start leaving soon. They both turned to walk through the room to the main foyer to see who had arrived. Blair walked slowly behind CeCe just praying that it wasn't Chuck arriving _now_. People would wonder why he was there. She didn't like it when people wondered.

"Why, Nathaniel Archibald, what a pleasure," CeCe exclaimed. She walked gracefully over to him and proffered her hand. He clasped it in greeting.

"Celia, lovely to see you again," Nate always had a way with parents and grandparents.

Blair was astonished to see Nate there. She also had a shadow of worry when she noticed the underside of his jaw.

"Nathaniel, look at you, off causing trouble? Who would have thought," CeCe said coyly.

"Oh no, just the wrong end of a football I'm afraid. Always remember to play with a helmet," he said charmingly. CeCe laughed.

Blair still hadn't said a word. She didn't believe a word he'd just said. She knew where he was last night. But surely Chuck would have called her if there was a fight, wouldn't he?

"Do, come join the party," CeCe took his arm and they began to join everyone.

"Actually, I came to talk to Blair, CeCe," Nate explained, stopping gently and trying to disengage himself from her grip.

"Oh, well, what wonderful timing you have!" CeCe exclaimed with mock excitement.

"Why is that?" Nate asked. Blair sucked in a breath. She knew what CeCe was going to say.

"Prince Theodore had to make an early exit from America this morning. Our poor Blair is left without an escort for the ball," CeCe almost pouted over the situation. Then she smiled. She knew he wasn't escorting anyone yet. "Why don't _you_ escort Miss Waldorf?" Blair cringed inside; she had to try really hard not to make a scene. She looked at Nate.

He was looking at her and grinned when he caught her eye, "It would be my honor."

"Well then, my dear," CeCe said, looking to Blair, "that's settled. No need to worry." CeCe was ecstatic. Nate's small bruise would be enough fodder to make people talk. Maybe, for once, Serena would get the good attention.

Blair opened her mouth to refuse, but she couldn't figure out what to say. There was no way she was going to the ball with Nate. Not only had he hurt her, but she had a serious feeling things had gone really badly with Chuck.

Out of the corner of her eye CeCe noticed someone exiting the bathroom. She excused herself. As she glided over to speak to Dan, Blair turned to Nate and glared.

"I am not going to the ball with you," she gave a fake smile as she said it so no one watching could tell they were about to argue.

"Listen Blair, just please give me a second to change your mind," Nate began.

"You aren't. You can't. I am not going to the ball with you. You shouldn't have accepted," Blair was furious.

"I'm sorry Blair," Nate said.

"You're sorry? I'm the one who's going to have to clean up this mess once CeCe starts spreading the word that I'm supposedly going to the ball with _you_," she snapped.

"Well, why not me? Who else are you going to ask on such short notice?" he leaned closer to whisper, "Not Chuck. We both know you wouldn't go with him." He still didn't want word to come out that Blair was—or had been—seeing Chuck.

She glared at him, knowing he spoke the truth. She didn't want anyone else to know either.

Their heads swiveled to look in the direction CeCe had gone when they heard a loud exclamation from Serena. She was hugging Dan and looking extremely happy. The look on CeCe's face was less so. Blair walked over to find out what had happened. She really needed to get away from Nate. Of course he followed her.

"Serena?" she asked.

"Blair! Guess what!" Serena was grinning from ear to ear.

"What? What?" Blair was catching her enthusiasm slowly. She wasn't really in the mood to jump up and down for whatever good news Serena had just received.

"Dan's going to the ball with me!" Serena hugged Dan tighter to her and kissed his cheek.

A smile started spreading across Blair's face and just like that the world was right again.

Carter had wondered over too when he heard Serena cry out. Blair looked from Serena to Carter and back to Serena.

"So…S?" Blair started. CeCe, already not happy with the turn in event, saw the look on Blair's face and, this time, _she_ knew what _Blair_ was about to say.

Serena looked up. "Mind if I take your castoffs?" Blair said, looking pointedly at Carter.

Serena laughed, "Sure B." Carter finally caught on to their exchange and he laughed.

"Being passed from one beautiful woman to another even more beautiful woman. A man would be proud to be on either of your arms," Carter walked over and took Blair's hand. He bowed over it before looking back up at her. "Would you do me the honor of allowing me to escort you to the ball?"

Blair smiled charmingly, "Of course." She let go of his hand. Turning back to the circle, she didn't look at Nate at all. She just wanted him gone. She laughed and turned to talk to Serena about who was doing her gown.

* * *

Slowly, but surely, all the guests left. The tables had been cleared and the staff was in the kitchen figuring out…well whatever staff needed to figure out to wrap up these sorts of parties.

Blair collapsed on the settee in her foyer. She was tired and worried, but also happy. She had a date to the ball! He already had a tux! Everything was going great and she'd become a lady tomorrow on the arm of a respectable gentleman.

She was worried still though. She had checked her cell numerous times and hadn't heard anything from Chuck. She hadn't been able to get away during the tea because she was playing hostess. She kept hoping he'd walk out of that elevator any minute now, but he hadn't yet.

Sighing, she picked up her phone. She was about to press Send when the elevator dinged. She looked up and frowned.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I couldn't leave it like that Blair. We need to talk, really talk," Nate said, walking forward with his arms out like the proverbial white flag.

"After everything you've put me through, I don't think we need to talk at all," Blair stood up. She was getting angrier by the moment.

"Please Blair, I know it's a little too late, but I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything," Nate said.

"You're sorry. You're sorry? So what? It's nothing new. And I just kept forgiving you. But that was when we _were_ together. That was when I _thought_ you loved me," Blair laid into him.

"Blair…," Nate started in disbelief that she wouldn't forgive him. "The picture was a lie. It was just a friend. I swear."

"Don't you get it Nate? This isn't about some picture. You slept with Serena! If I could forgive you for that don't you think I could forgive a picture?" She asked. Her composure was slipping and she disliked that.

Nate opened and closed his mouth but no words came out. He didn't know what to say. He didn't understand what this was about obviously.

"I asked you if you love me and you didn't answer," she cried. "Every single thing that you put me through, I put up with it. I did it because I loved you. And I stupidly thought you loved me back." Tears were streaming down her face.

Nate couldn't take the guilt anymore. He reached out and pulled her into his arms. She was so distressed that she let herself be pulled in for some small comfort. They had been friends and significant others for so long, it just felt natural to hold each other.

Blair cried into his chest for a moment. When her tears slowed and she was sniffling, he whispered, "Blair?"

She looked up. Her eyes were so big and sorrowful. She was so beautiful, even when she cried. He wanted to take away the pain. He brought his lips up against hers.

She stiffened and he wrapped his arms around her, holding her to him, not wanting to let her go.

Ding. The elevator sounded once again.

Nate finally let go of her and they both looked at the newest arrival.

Blair gasped as she saw Chuck. She froze, not knowing what to do.

Nate looked at Chuck with a smirk. He winked at him.

Chuck's face was unsmiling. He looked from Blair to Nate, then back to Blair. With a deep breath, he reached out his hand and pressed a button on the elevator panel and the doors slid shut.

Blair screamed, "Chuck!" She tried to run to stop the elevator but it was too late. It was far too late.

She threw her arms up against the metal and turned around.

"I think it's time for you to leave," she said without any emotion.

"Blair, c'mon," Nate tried to reason with her.

"Did you do that to him?" Blair wanted to cry again just thinking about the bruises on his face.

"You don't understand, Blair, I do. I love you. I love you. Believe me, please," Nate was getting desperate because this wasn't going at all like he hoped.

"I said, GET OUT!" She was pissed. "And don't come near me again! We are done for good! You disgust me!"

He sighed in defeat and walked over to press the button on the cursed elevator. He was going to have to wait for it to come back up.

She looked at him with anger and revulsion before running over to the window that faced the front of the building.

She saw Chuck walking furiously to his limo. He got inside the back and it drove away. She put her hand to her mouth and worked hard at stopping the tears from coming.

She didn't know how to fix this, but she just knew she had to. She needed Chuck, more than she ever thought possible.


	5. Chapter 5

**Warning**: There is a section of this chapter rated **M**. If the rating offends you, just move to the next story segment as indicated by the dashes. You will still be able to follow the story if you skip that part! The chapter _will_ be shorter for you though.

* * *

_After she finally arrived home from dance practice, she raced up the stairs to freshen up. She knew he would be there any minute. It had become something of a ritual—and it was Friday…and her mother was in Paris._

_She had just finished applying a fresh layer of her favorite cherry red lipstick when the elevator sounded from below and the maid called, "Miss Blair? Mister Bass is here."_

_She raced to the steps and slowed to walk down them. But he was already on his way up. They met at the halfway point._

"_Anxiously waiting for me I see," he teased._

"_You wish," she rolled her eyes. "Did anyone see you?"_

"_You forget who you're talking to. CIA remember? Stealthy," he smirked. "Are we going to do this or stand here all day?" He stopped smirking and looked at her with his sexy eyes and fierce lips, a small smile playing on those lips._

_She appeared to be pondering his question before she reached out her hand politely. He grasped it. She turned and led him back to her room._

_As they crossed the threshold, he jerked on the hand he was holding and she spun back into his arms. His hand came up to stroke her cheek as his lips settled on hers. She met his lips and they welcomed each other._

_Finally breaking away, she smiled at him before taking his hand again and leading him to her bed. He removed his scarf which he'd accidentally left on when checking his coat in downstairs. He tossed it to the floor and followed her. She scooted back until her head reached the pillows, still holding his hand. He crawled up with her and lay between her legs. His eyes were filled with desire as they met hers before his mouth returned to her lips._

_She moaned into his kiss, meeting his lips, and sliding her foot up his leg, teasing him with her touch. He reached down to take a hold of her leg, sliding his hand up to the knee, which she bent and wrapped around him. His hand continued up her thigh, caressing her._

_The feel of his touch excited her. She explored his lips as her hands reached up to the collar of his shirt. She was too distracted by his kisses to do much more than slide her hands up to caress his neck before running her fingers through his hair._

_He began talking in between their kisses. "You were pretty hot on Princess Theodore's arm today."_

_She loved word play with him. Its part of the reason she enjoyed this so much. "Oh, is that all I am to you, just an accessory?" She teased. Her voice was husky, he was affecting her so._

_She arched her hips up, playing with him where their clothed bodies nestled against each other. He pulled his head back and grinned enticingly at her. "Next to him, yes," his smile became mischievous as he held onto her and rolled to his back, pulling her with him. She went along and straddled him. "On me, you'd be so much more."_

_She smiled and brushed her hair behind her ear. "Yes, but I can't be on you remember? Cause you don't want Nate to find out," she rested her thighs more firmly around him. _

_Grinning, she felt the evidence of his desire rub against her. "I don't want anyone to," she whispered, leaning down to kiss him. He pressed his mouth up against hers. Her hands fisted into his shirt at the shoulders and she pulled him up, closer to her. He went willingly, following her movements._

_His arms came up around her as he sat up, holding her close and reaching for a kiss. "You have to learn how to behave yourself first," she met his lips, running her fingers through his hair._

_Their lips met hungrily and their bodies flirted with each other. When she couldn't stand the maddening teasing anymore, she pushed him back down on the bed and hopped off of him._

"_Going somewhere?" he asked, clearly surprised that she would stop there._

"_Not too far," she grinned as she strolled over and closed her bedroom door._

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_He grinned seductively at her. She took her shirt off slowly. His eyes appreciated her smooth stomach before following the path of the shirt. She grinned and quickly turned around. She moved her hips to some inner song as she reached for the waistband of her shorts and red leggings. Bending forward, she slid them down and stepped out of them. He admired her firm little derriere, covered in cotton. Her hips still moved to some inner music._

_He couldn't tear his eyes away as he reached up and undid his own shirt's buttons. He had just started to pull his arms out of the sleeves when she spread her legs apart. Her hands were at her hips and she traced them down her legs as she bent down again. He hurriedly finished with his shirt and pulled his undershirt off as he scooted over to the edge of the bed, kicking his shoes off._

_Once she reached her ankles, she turned her head to the right and rose back up, peaking over her shoulder, grinning seductively at him._

"_Not tell anyone? I don't think anyone would believe me." He was always awed whenever she surprised him with her actions. She turned and rolled her eyes at him, moving her hips seductively still. He undid his belt and removed his pants quickly. He looked up, hoping she'd come back to bed now._

_She looked down at him and back up to his face expectantly. He quirked an eyebrow. "Oh," he grinned. He pulled his boxers off. He stood up and started to walk towards her. "Better?"_

_Instead of answering, she leapt into his arms, resting her thighs on his hips. He stumbled backwards and they landed on the bed. The bed squeaked from the force of their fall but neither of them paid attention as their mouths met hungrily, more forcefully than before._

_He reached around her and undid the clasp on her bra. Pulling back for a second, she threaded her arms through the straps and tossed the lingerie aside before falling back down to kiss him. In a move they had perfected earlier, she dragged him into a sitting position, her legs on either side of him. His mouth left her lips and trailed down her chin to her breasts. _

_She moaned and arched her back, feeling his mouth and tongue savoring first one then the other. Her hands were fisted in his hair, pulling him towards her. Her hips rocked back and forth against him._

_When she couldn't take anymore, she tugged on his hair, forcing his head back; and she leaned down to kiss him again. She paused and grinned at the look of desire on his face. She pushed him down onto his back, falling forward against him. She kissed him again, enjoying the taste of his lips. His arms came up around her and with a quick move, she was under him._

_He pulled back and grinned at her as his hands found her panties and he slid them down off her. He was back on her, kissing her, sliding between her thighs. He shifted and then froze._

_She looked at him, questioningly. He looked over his shoulder; she realized why he'd stopped. "Drawer, over there," she said, nodding to her nightstand. There was no way she was letting him leave her to go find his pants when she had what they needed right there._

_He reached over and found what he was looking for. He removed his heat for the moment it took to protect her, but then he was back._

_They both moaned loudly as he thrust into her. He slid back and forward again. She cried out, arching her hips. He continued at a maddening slow pace, driving her slowly insane with his control. "Chuck…" she groaned out. "Please," she drew her legs up and wrapped them around him, "Harder." _

_He decided to give her what she wanted. He picked up the pace, driving his own need to uncontrollable heights. _

_They were in their own world and nothing outside their bubble could penetrate through: which is why neither of them heard the soft ding of the elevator through their passion haze—or through the door she had remembered to close._

_He propelled himself into her, harder, making the mattress squeak from his efforts. _

"_Yes," she cried out, bucking her hips against him. He couldn't stop the groans rising in his chest as he felt her start clenching around him. Her moans turned to the tiny whimpers that always preceded her orgasm. It drove him to distraction, listening to her purr._

_Finally she bucked her hips up one last time as her world exploded around her, grabbing hold of him as she fell back to the bed. He lost all control and pushed into her once, twice, three times more before his own orgasm came. He groaned out her name and collapsed on top of her, completely spent._

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_They lay there, snuggled against one another, enjoying the feel of each other's bodies. _

"_So what happens if I promise to behave?" He finally spoke, remembering her words earlier._

_She didn't speak for a moment. Slowly she lifted her head off his chest. "What?" she asked._

"_If I behave, what then," he didn't like to repeat himself._

_Shock was threading its way through her system. _Chuck Bass wanted to behave…for her? _She flopped on her back and stared at the ceiling. "Chuck…" she began, sighing._

"_What?"_

"_It's just that…," _how to explain this to him, _"I like where we're at. Can't we just let it be what it is for now?"_

_At her words, he flopped onto his own back and joined her in staring at the ceiling. Regret filled him. If he had known years ago what he knew now…maybe he would have done things differently. He would give anything to be with her every day, in every way. She didn't want him that much though. He had to hope that maybe one day she would._

_He remembered Nate's words that morning. She was glowing, happy, because of_ him_. Nothing could have made him prouder hearing Nate say those words._

_It was what Nate said after that made him get worried. He knew that Blair loved Nate. He knew the only reason she had turned to him was because of her dissolution revolving around Nate. He knew that even after Nate didn't return her love she tried so hard to get him back the day before her birthday._

_He wished he could turn back time and behave like a little bitch. Maybe then he could walk around proudly on Blair's arm. Maybe then his father wouldn't treat him like he was so worthless. Maybe then he wouldn't feel even more worthless as she told him—without really saying the words—that she was too ashamed to be seen with him._

"_How about a shower?" He didn't want to think about this anymore. He was with her right now; he might as well enjoy her while he could._

"_A shower? Chuck," she laughed out loud, relieved he'd changed the subject, "I'm meeting Serena for dinner tonight. I don't have much time."_

"_Don't worry." he grinned and grabbed her arm, "this shouldn't take _too_ long."_

_She followed him, laughing as he pulled her into her private bathroom._

* * *

Her mind was playing the details of yesterday's love play better than any "sex tape" could. It came complete with touch, taste, and smells whereas any normal video just used the other two senses.

She was excited to be in her first sexual relationship and she enjoyed it so much. If only it wasn't Chuck…but then would any of this have happened if he wasn't Chuck?

She didn't know. She just knew that she was madly confused. She didn't know or trust the feelings that Chuck evoked because she didn't trust him, not completely. Sure, she trusted him with her virginity. She trusted him to keep this a secret.

She also knew that Chuck had feelings for her. First butterflies then he wanted to behave. Nate was his best friend, but he would still act weird whenever she mentioned his name, almost like he was jealous.

Between the kiss he had just witnessed and the look on his face, she knew that he was hurt—really hurt. She didn't want that. She needed to find him and make this right. She needed to tell him that she hadn't lied. She _had_ moved on. She was with Chuck right now…just that nobody else knew about it. And she didn't know how she felt about him…only that she cared.

With that in mind, Blair walked gracefully through The Palace's door and went straight to the desk. Chuck had turned his phone off again, she had to track him down the old-fashioned way.

"Is Chuck Bass in?" She asked, hoping like crazy that he was.

"No Miss Waldorf," the front deskman answered recognizing her.

She sighed and looked around. She knew the drill. She wasn't in the mood to wait around. She looked at the man again. "Do you have any idea where he went? When he'll be back?"

The man kept his face as neutral as possible. "No miss." He didn't want to point out that the boy never left that kind of information.

"Is Serena Van Der Woodsen in?" She asked.

He looked at his screen again. "Yes."

"Good," she said before turning haughtily and walking toward the elevator. She needed to talk to someone about everything that was happening. Why not her best friend—and the only other person in the world that she _could_ talk to who knew about her and Chuck?

She only hoped Serena could pull some wisdom out of her hat that would help her find Chuck and fix the problem.


	6. Chapter 6

"B?" Serena said as she opened the door to her hotel suite.

"I need to talk to you," Blair said quickly as she walked into the foyer.

"Of course," Serena said. They walked to Serena's room and Blair collapsed face forward on the bed.

"S! Why is nothing ever simple anymore?" Blair rolled onto her back.

Serena walked over to the bed and sat on the edge.

"What's going on?" Serena asked.

"Nate found out," she huffed out. Serena thought for a moment about what Nate could possibly have to find out about Blair…

"Oh…" Serena looked down. "Well, it was bound to happen. I'm sorry B…maybe he won't hold it against you?" She knew how much Blair loved Nate. She hoped that Nate hadn't been too hard on her.

"What?" Blair turned her head and looked at her in confusion, "Oh, no. I don't want him back."

"Then…what's the problem?" Serena was confused.

"He confronted Chuck about it," Blair began. "Chuck's face is a mess." Blair closed her eyes.

"Nate did that?" Serena questioned. She didn't think he'd do more than throw a punch.

"Yeah, apparently he realized, a little too late I might add, that he loves me," she threw her arms up in the air, opening her eyes.

"Is that what he came by the tea today to talk about?" Serena asked.

"No. He wanted me to go to the ball with him. I managed my way out of that situation—thank goodness for Dan…can't believe I just said that," Blair rolled her eyes.

"Anyway, that's not the issue. I basically told him to forget about me," Blair continued.

"B, I'm so proud of you. Putting Nate behind you—I didn't think that was possible," Serena said, and she hadn't. She still couldn't stand to be near Nate herself. She almost lost her best friend because of some drunken sex. "Now you can take a break from guys. At least you only slept with him twice before ending it. Chuck is not someone to play with."

"You don't understand!" Blair cried out, covering her face with her hands.

"Okay, B, make me understand," Serena said, totally confused again.

"He kissed me!"

"Who?" Serena asked. Nate? Chuck?

"Nate! I didn't want him to. He surprised me! And Chuck," Blair tore her hands off her face. "Chuck walked in right then! Serena, I didn't break things off with Chuck. I've been seeing him for weeks."

Serena said, "Oh." She finally understood. "What did Chuck say?" Hoping the ass hadn't made things worse.

"Nothing, S, nothing at all. He just left," Blair said. "But his face! Even under the bruises I could see that look. I never thought I'd see it on his face. He looked defeated. S, I think he really cares about me. I don't know what to do. I can't find him and his phone is turned off! I just need to tell him that he didn't see what he thought he saw. Ah!"

Serena frowned. She didn't really know what to say…she didn't like Chuck too much.

"Well, he lives in this building…" Serena began.

"He's not here. Don't you think I tried that?" Blair huffed.

"Well, he has to come home sometime," Serena said.

"I know! I just…I need to do this now. I can't stand it S! He's going around all defeated thinking I'm back with Nate," Blair looked up at Serena.

Serena was shocked to see the beginning of tears in her eyes…for Chuck Bass?

"Blair…do you have feelings for Chuck? I mean, besides sleeping with him?" Serena struggled around those last words. The thought of sleeping with Chuck was making her nauseous. She shook her head. If _Blair_ thought Chuck had feelings for her, there was a huge possibility that he did. Chuck Bass having feelings? When did that happen?

"I…I don't know. I care about what happens to him, I guess."

"Blair, I don't think you'd be here crying right now if you didn't have feelings for him. It sounds like you're scared you'll lose him," Serena said. She was worried that Blair was falling into another relationship too fast—with the wrong guy again. "Maybe you should just wait and see? I mean, the ball's in his court right? Or you could wait here and have the front desk call when he arrives?"

Blair huffed and sat up. "The ball isn't in his court. There is no ball. He sucks at basketball anyway. He thinks I've chosen Nate and he doesn't think he can compete with him. It's all because I want to keep us a secret."

"Well, why wouldn't you want to keep this a secret? He has to see that his past actions are not going to endear anyone to him. And that you would just be brought down with him," Serena said.

"I don't want to wait here. I have to find him," Blair hopped off the bed.

"Where are you going to go?" Serena asked, wishing Blair would just sit down and chill out.

"I don't know! But I can't just sit here like nothing is happening," she walked towards the doors. She stopped and looked back.

"Thanks for listening S," Blair said.

"Croissants and Tiffany tomorrow morning?" Serena asked, bringing up their Sunday morning tradition.

Blair sighed, "Sure S." Then she left.

* * *

She couldn't believe she was so desperate that she came back _here_.

She didn't have any other options. Serena was going to call if the front desk informed her that Chuck had returned to The Palace. In the meantime, she had cruised around in a cab aimlessly until she realized how futile it was: too many limos and too much traffic. She told the cabbie to go to Victrola as a last resort. That was a bust too.

Now she found herself in the last place she ever thought she'd be, again.

Taking a deep breath she quickly walked up the steps and entered the church.

She paused as she walked inside, wondering if the same priest was there. She really didn't feel like explaining everything to some new guy.

She hurried over to the first confessional and entered quickly. She took her seat and began.

"Bless me father, for I have sinned," she knew those words from endless movies. She used them the last time she was here too. "It's been…about three weeks since my last confession."

"What is troubling you my child?" The priest said.

"Well…wait. Are you the priest who told me he wasn't a genie?" She asked.

There was a cough from the other side of the confessional. "That is correct." The priest had himself a good laugh over that once she left.

"Good, so I don't have to say it all again. The thing is I'm not here because I sinned. Well, I kind of did," images of being with Chuck raced through her mind, "but that's not why I'm here."

"Why are you here?" the priest sighed.

"Well…do you remember the name of the guy I mentioned last time?"

"No," the priest said.

"Good, okay," she knew priests were supposed to keep a vow of silence—or something like that—but she wasn't taking any chances. "So, the guy I was with, let's just call him…" she searched for a name, "Duck." Hey, it rhymed.

Another cough sounded from across the area, "Duck?"

"Yes, Duck. Okay, so I didn't do what you said. I didn't stay away from…Duck. But I couldn't help it because N—…let's call _him_ Late, my ex-boyfriend, didn't want to get back together. And it's turned out okay, except now Duck thinks I'm back with Late when I'm not and I'm trying to find Duck before he's hurt even more; and he's missing and…he kissed me!"

"Duck?" the priest asked, trying to follow the conversation.

"No, Late! Late realized that he did love me and wanted to get back together, but he was a little too late," she explained.

"Because you're with Duck…?" the priest asked.

"Yes. I mean, not _with him_ with him. I mean, I'm seeing him but it's a secret. Nobody can know because Duck doesn't have the best reputation," she sighed.

"I see," the priest said.

"No you don't see," she sighed, "why does Duck have to be so…Duck! And why is this happening to me? I am a good person!" At least she hoped she was.

"Good things come to those who wait," he said.

"Good things? Do you mean like karma?" she asked.

"Well, no…and yes...the church believes that you will be richly rewarded for all your good deeds once you are in heaven. Buddhists believe in karma, meaning what you do will come back to help or hinder you in this lifetime or the next," he tried to explain.

"So, wait…I have to suffer because Duck has bad karma? Knowing he hurts makes _me_ hurt. That's so not fair," she grumbled. "Do you have any idea how many bad things he has done? I'm going to suffer with him for like, forever." Although she seriously didn't think she'd be with him that long.

"I said that's what Buddhists believe. The church believes that if you ask forgiveness for your trespasses against others, the Lord will cleanse you of that sin," the priest was glad to explain basic religion to this crazy girl.

"Ask forgiveness from whom? This isn't an episode of My Name is Earl. Ch—I mean, Duck is not going to every single person he did wrong to and apologize," she rolled her eyes. She hated that show. She also didn't think Chuck had apologized for anything in his life.

"From the Lord," he explained.

She rolled her eyes again. She didn't really believe in all this stuff but it was her last resort. "Speaking of, why is Duck…Duck? I mean is there any hope that he's going to change? I mean, he's two completely different people. The one he shows me and then the one he shows everyone else. But the things he's done! Why did he have to do them in the first place?"

The priest thought about it then asked, "Do you know the story of the Ugly Duckling?"

She snorted, "Very funny." She couldn't believe he—a priest!—was making a joke about something so serious.

"The duck grew up with other ducks and never fit in. No matter what he did, he always looked and acted different. He couldn't help it. And he didn't know better. He felt awkward and ugly and worthless. He tried so hard, but all the ducks only saw what they wanted to see," the priest told the story.

"Yeah," she said, tilting her head, "I know the story. But what does this have to do with anything? He wasn't even a duck. He grew into a beautiful swan. He was a cygnet. He just got separated from the rest of his…flock…or whatever." She shook her head.

"I don't see why we're having this discussion. That's not why I'm here," she huffed.

"On the contrary, I believe it is. You obviously have feelings for this boy even if you wish you didn't. And it scares you because you know what kind of person he's always been—and it's not the person you want to be with. But what you don't understand is that we are all human. We make the wrong choices and sometimes we just don't know any better. One day we learn what's right and what's important. Even the ugliest creature can grow to be the most beautiful—they just need proper guidance." The priest was actually starting to make sense to her. But it was still a weird analogy.

Sighing, she figured she was going to have to think about this, she said, "Thank you, father, for the advice."

"You are welcome," he said.

She started to get up, thought for a second and sat back down facing him. "Last time I asked you to tell 'you-know-who' to send my boyfriend back to me—and he did…a little too late I might add—but, for whatever reason," she still didn't think she believed in God and divine intervention or whatever, "it worked. So this time when you talk to 'you-know-who' can you tell him to send Duck back to me no later than, oh say, four o'clock tomorrow?" She could wait that long. She didn't want to go to the ball still feeling down because she didn't know where Chuck was.

She thought about it. "Okay, correction. Tell him to send _Chuck_ back to me no later than four o'clock tomorrow." She wasn't taking any chances. She'd probably end up with a real duck, as crazy as that sounds.

"I'll see what I can do," the priest sighed.

She got up once again and opened the door of the booth slightly before she turned and leaned down towards his side of the booth.

"And father?" she began.

"Yes, my child?" he asked.

"Eastern Standard Time."

"Noted."

* * *

She had gone home after that. Serena had the whole front desk staff on red-alert. She wasn't desperate enough to brave Bad Bart yet. She couldn't do much more. And, no, his phone wasn't turned back on. She had tried every fifteen minutes since she started on her search.

She went to sleep that night thinking about what the priest said. She knew everything he said was true…but she also knew what it was like living in her world. Her friends would never understand if she was with Chuck Bass. She thrived on being perfect. Chuck Bass wasn't perfect. She couldn't be with him.

She woke the next morning and flung off her face mask. Serena would be there any minute for brunch and they had lots to do if her plan was going to work.

She quickly showered and dressed and was walking down her staircase when Serena arrived.

"B, wow, you look much better than you did last night," she exclaimed, walking over to give Blair a hug.

Blair returned the hug, "I've had a lot to think about. Any word?" She lead Serena over to have a seat and dug in for a croissant. She really was famished—she couldn't remember eating dinner yesterday.

"No," Serena said. "No one at the front desk has seen him coming or going. I even knocked on his door before I came over here just to make sure. No answer. I'm sorry B." She really was sorry. She may not like Chuck, but she didn't want Blair to be upset.

"It's okay! I have an idea," Blair said. "I'll just wait and see him tonight at the ball. I need your help to get him alone, but then I can explain everything to him. I mean, he's going with Jessica so he has to show up."

Serena started shaking her head, "Blair."

Blair had been smiling, she looked at Serena, "What?"

"Chuck isn't going to the ball with Jessica."

"Who's he going with?"

"No one," Serena said.

"What? Why not? How do you know?" Blair paused, "Silly me, just because I haven't read the site doesn't mean it stops running."

"Apparently…Jessica doesn't want to see her debut ruined by walking up with a guy who had his face stomped on recently," Serena explained.

Blair sighed and sat down.

"Well maybe he'll just show up anyway? You know how he is," Blair said.

"Uh, yeah…sure. I know exactly how he is," Serena didn't hide the perplexed look on her face very well.

They finished their croissants in silence, and tried to enjoy the movie. It wasn't happening. Finally Blair stood up and turned it off.

"The New York Times journalist I was telling you about is coming in like a half hour so I really need to prepare for his questions," Blair said.

"Oh! Well have fun. I'll see you tonight then," Serena smiled at her.

Walking over, Serena wrapped her arms around her. "It's going to work out, you'll see. I have my phone at the ready waiting for that call from the hotel. As soon as I hear anything, you'll be the first to know."

"Thanks S, see you tonight." She stepped away and watched Serena exit.

So Plan A had fallen through. What about Plan B? Oh wait, she didn't _have_ one of those.

_Where the hell are you Bass?_ She thought. She was going to give Mr. Genie-man until 4 to make this happen, but she was still worried.

What would she do if Chuck didn't get a hold of her by then? She had no idea.


	7. Chapter 7

The reporter had finally left. The interview had been painless and it was good publicity for her mother _and_ for her. Always caring for that appearance thing…she couldn't help it—that's the way she was raised.

She had a million things to do to prepare for the ball. Her dress had been sent to Serena's apartment so she wouldn't have to travel in the gown—she could just get ready at Serena's Palace hotel room. After all, the ball was going to take place there. She had to do hair and makeup before she left for Serena's but she couldn't seem to make herself move.

She was waiting for a phone call that she was beginning to think wouldn't come. She glanced at the clock: 2:00pm. Two more hours. She sighed and flopped back onto her bed.

She couldn't believe that she was buying into all this crap. Half of her just wanted to forget about this whole four o'clock thing. It was just stupid and silly and wasn't going to happen. It was the other half that was hoping and on the edge of her seat.

Ding.

Her bedroom door was closed and the words Rosa called were muffled and accented but it sounded like…_no, couldn't be_…Did she just say Mr. Bass?

She nearly dove off the bed and raced for the door. She flung it open and ran down the steps in a flurry of skirts, completely forgetting about appearing composed.

She reached the bottom of the steps and turned to the entrance with a "Where have you been!"

"Well, sorry I didn't get here sooner. I probably should have just waited to get it from you tonight but I figured you would be too occupied with preparing," Carter said. "Just point me in the direction of my jacket and I'll be out of your hair for now."

Mr._ Baiz_en is what Rosa said. Damn it, the accent made her draw out the first syllable oddly and because her voice was muffled Blair just hadn't made out the rest.

"Oh, it's you," she said, letting out a breath.

"Not usually the reaction I get," Carter laughed.

"It's over there," she said pointing to an overstuffed chair that she had draped the jacket on earlier. She turned and started walking back up the steps again.

He started walking over to the chair. She paused on the bottom step, turned around, and walked over to him.

"Carter? A question," Blair spoke with a command in her voice. Carter looked at her and shrugged and nodded.

"Was it worth it?" Blair asked. She couldn't believe she was asking him this, but she just had to know.

"Was what worth what?" Carter asked.

"Leaving all this behind. Forgetting who you were, throwing everything into society's face, and doing what you want to do. Was it worth it?" She didn't even know Carter but she wanted his opinion very badly. Why? She wasn't sure.

"Yes," Carter said simply.

"But why? What made it worth it?" She wasn't going to let him stop there.

"It might not have lasted long, but I wouldn't trade that little era of my life for all the money in the world. I couldn't live my life based on what other people wanted from me. I wanted to live and make decisions on my own terms. I wasn't going to be happy living someone else's lie," Carter responded. It was a very open response and he normally wouldn't be talking this much but she seemed more like a lost little girl than the Blair Waldorf that he had always known.

"Even knowing what you do now? That you had to come back home with your tail between your legs…sorry to be so blunt," Blair didn't really want to offend him—but it _was_ the truth.

"Blair, I'm not happy right now but for that brief moment I was. And nothing's changed really. I came back and society welcomed me with open arms. They were willing to forgive even though I turned my back on what they thought was proper. And it's okay because at least I will never wonder 'what if' and kick myself because I should have left long ago. I took a chance and, in the process, found out who I am," Carter finished. He grabbed his jacket.

"I really need to go get ready for tonight. I'll see you at the ball, partner?" Carter winked at her.

"See you," Blair said, already turning to walk back upstairs—lost in her own little world.

Carter just shrugged and left. He didn't know what was on his date's mind, and he really didn't care. He just wanted to get this over with.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

She had finally managed to arrive at Serena's. She put the thoughts of Chuck and genies out of her head and got down to the business of preparing for the ball that she had waited her entire adolescent life for. Chuck had disappeared. He had to show up again sometime.

There was a knock at the door and Serena left her bedroom to answer. Blair peeked to see who it was. It was Dan, of course. He was a little early but maybe Serena could show him a few dance steps before they had to go down—she had witnessed his two-fists-pumping dance at her birthday party. She didn't want to see it again.

She returned to the vanity, making sure her coif was absolutely perfect and smooth.

She felt the presence of someone at the door to the room and turned to find Serena standing there with tears welling in her eyes.

"Serena? Honey," Blair said. "What's wrong?"

"Dan…Dan…we're not going together," Serena whispered.

"What? Why not?" Blair asked.

"He…he's just not going," Serena said firmly. She didn't want to explain this, not yet. Then she realized…

"Blair! I don't have a date! My grandmother is sick and all she wants is to see me walk up those stupid stairs and be presented to society! What am I going to do?" Serena said morosely.

Blair thought for a moment and the beginning of an amazing scheme started forming.

"S…?" Could Blair really ask Serena to do this?

Serena looked at Blair and thought she knew what she was going to say. She started backing out of the room.

"No, oh no. No way," Serena said.

Blair bounced up and followed her into the living room area.

"Please S? Please?" Blair was begging with her lost little girl look.

"Blair, I can't, I couldn't…there is no way on God's green earth I would go anywhere with _Chuck Bass!_" Serena had been trying to support her best friend through this entire mess, but she had to draw the line somewhere. She _hated_ Chuck!

"Don't you see? This is perfect! He'll be there and I'll have no problem getting him alone. I can explain everything and he'll know I'm not with L—, I mean Nate. We can go back to where we were two days ago with no one the wiser!" Blair really wanted Serena to do this.

"Blair, even if I said yes, you haven't been able to find Chuck anywhere. What makes you think we'll be able to find Chuck for this? Do you think he's just going to miraculously turn his cell phone on _now_?" Serena really didn't want to do this.

Blair sighed, "You're right. I didn't think that one through. You can't really go to the ball with Chuck if we can't reach him."

"You want to go to the ball with Chuck? Chuck_ Bass_?" Lily had just walked out of her room, having heard some loud voices but not making out the words.

Serena looked at her mother and sighed.

"Dan isn't going to the ball with Serena, so she needs a date. The guys we know are already going with someone. I suggested Chuck but nobody has been able to get a hold of him because his phone is turned off," Blair explained. She threw her arms up before wrapping them around her waist and turning away from the two. She had felt some small hope for a minute, but she should have known better.

"How about Bart?" Lily asked.

Blair turned around, and Serena swiveled her head to look at her mother.

Lily looked at both of them and gave a small smile.

"Bart _is_ his father. I'm sure he'll be able to track him down," Lily said.

"Mother…" Serena began.

"In fact, I'll call him myself to ask. He owes me anyway," Lily took her cell out of her handbag. Serena looked at her suspiciously as Lily thumbed through her phone.

"You know Bart Bass?" Serena asked.

"Darling, everyone knows Bart Bass. He _is_ the owner of the hotel we live in. He'll be happy to help you get a date with Chuck to the ball," Lily said.

"Lily! Put that phone away!" CeCe had just walked out of the guestroom and heard the last thing that was said.

Lily paused, she was about to press Send.

"Grandmom! I know how much you want me to go to the ball, and Dan can't go. So we're trying to find someone else," Serena explained. She didn't mention that she still hadn't _agreed_ to go with Chuck even if they _could_ find him.

"Absolutely not," CeCe said. "I want to see you presented to society as a lady. Chuck Bass is not at all suitable for you." CeCe started thinking of someone, _any_one who could be suitable but she kept drawing a blank. She had already found the perfect escort for Serena—but he was taking Blair now.

CeCe glared at Blair, who just glared back at her.

Serena turned back to Blair. "I'm sorry B…I can't…"

Blair looked down. Then for some ungodly—or maybe it _was_ Godly—reason her eyes moved to the clock on the wall. It read four o'clock.

Blair looked at Lily. "Call him."

Lily looked at her confused.

"Nonsense," CeCe started.

"Call Bart," she said again like a command, interrupting the older woman.

"B…" Serena thought she knew what Blair was about to say.

Blair looked at her.

"Are you sure?" Serena said.

Blair closed her eyes tight and nodded.

"Well am I calling Bart or not? And what am I to ask?" Lily said, perplexed.

Blair kept her eyes closed tight as she said, "Tell Bart that Serena needs a date; would he find Chuck and get him to go with her?"

"But—," CeCe began.

Blair opened her eyes and stared CeCe down. "But Serena will not be walking up those stairs with him. I will."

"Blair…" Serena said. "Do you know what this means?"

"Yes. You will have the suitable escort that CeCe wants for you…Carter. And I…well…" She thought back over the last twenty four hours. She cleared her throat. "It's only right, isn't it? Carter was yours to begin with."

"So…tell me again why I'm lying to Bart about Chuck going with Serena instead of just saying you?" Lily asked.

"Don't worry Mrs. Van der Woodsen," Blair said. "Just find out if Bart can get a hold of Chuck first. That's the big question."

With that, Blair turned and returned to Serena's room. She sat on the bed and stared straight ahead, unable to process what had just happened.

Meanwhile, Serena watched her mother press Send and walk away. Her mother seemed much too friendly on that phone for Bart Bass to be an acquaintance.

She didn't even want to think about it. She returned to her room and saw Blair sitting as if in shock.

"Blair, honey, it's not too late to stop this," Serena began. She didn't want Blair to be humiliated. She didn't want Blair to be hurt. Chuck Bass was an ass and didn't deserve Blair at all. But if Chuck is who Blair wants…he better be at the damn Cotillion with bells on, a smile, and massive amounts of cover-up.

Blair glanced at her before resuming her stare at the wall. "It'll be alright S. They'll all just assume that I didn't have another option. Everyone knows the Prince had to leave un-expectantly. And everyone knows I'm not with Nate anymore. No one will think anything about my going with a friend."

Serena just said, "Okay." But she wasn't that naïve. Blair standing up with Chuck was going to make the gossip mill go crazy. And if that wasn't enough, it was obvious both Chuck and Nate had been in a fight lately. Everyone was going to put two and two together and come up with four…but if Blair wanted to maintain that the answer was five…who was Serena to stop her?

"He'll be there," Lily said from the door. "Bart will make sure of it." She closed the door.

Serena looked at Blair. Blair closed her eyes and nodded. "It's done."


	8. Chapter 8

She was waiting close to the bottom of the stairs, people milling around her all in a flurry of preparation. She and Serena were keeping a look out at both entrances. The plan was very precise. The moment he arrived Serena would take him aside—there was a small alcove with a bench down the hall out of the way near the restrooms—and explain everything. Blair was supposed to wait at least five minutes so Serena could give him the details before she walked in. Who knows what his reaction would be if she walked in before he knew the truth.

"You look beautiful," a voice behind her said.

She spun around with a gasp, _great._

"Nate, um, thanks," Blair said. She turned slightly to continue watching, wishing Nate would go away. "I thought I told you not to come near me again."

"Blair, I…I'm sorry," Nate said. She still wouldn't look at him. "Look, we've been friends all these years too. I miss you. I…I know I hurt you, and I'm sorry."

She didn't say anything to him, just kept her head turned away.

"Blair, at least look at me," Nate said.

Blair spared him a glance, "Please just go away." She _really_ didn't want him standing with her right now.

"Blair…I know you've moved on," he gave a small laugh. "I don't think he deserves you…but if he makes you happy…I can live with it."

Startled, she turned to look at him finally.

"Blair, I know I'm late," Nate said. "I'm so late. I couldn't figure out what I wanted before I lost it. I do love you Blair. And I know you don't want to be with me anymore…but just let me be in your life somehow?" He held out his hand. "Friends?"

She stared at him, a little wary of this new line, but realized that he was being sincere. She looked at his proffered hand and back up into his face. She reached out and held his hand, "Friends," she confirmed.

She dropped his hand and looked at her surroundings again just in time to see Serena dragging Chuck down the hall. She looked at the clock on the wall. Five minutes. She just had to wait five more minutes until she could make things right with Chuck.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_What the hell am I doing here?_ Chuck was so pissed at his father. Only his father could issue a command to make Chuck be at the one place he didn't want to be. Chuck did not want to see Blair. He did not want to see Nate. In fact, he just wanted to be as far away as possible.

Saturday, after seeing Blair in Nate's arms, he had left her apartment in a rush. It had been the longest elevator ride of his life. After getting into the limo he didn't know where to go. He told his man to drive aimlessly around the city.

During his journey he couldn't help thinking about the past few weeks with Blair. Even though she had wanted to keep everything a secret, he knew she was perfect for him. She could be as devious as he when the situation arose. He'd gotten such a kick out of outing Serena in front of the Ivy League representatives. He had stood proudly by as Blair went up front and proved just how much of a "mean girl" she could be.

She knew how his mind worked. He admired her for that. She accepted his friendship despite everything he had done in the past.

He had tried hitting on her a couple of times, but that was more for appearances sake—he didn't think she'd ever go for him. Plus, she was his best friend's girl. If there was one girl in all of the Upper East Side that he couldn't plow, it was her.

It wasn't until Victrola that he saw how perfect they were for each other. Up until then he thought she was manipulative and scheming like him, but never did he think that she could be as sexual or as passionate as him. And man, did she ever have a sexual appetite to match his.

After he took her virginity in the back of his limo he couldn't get her out of his mind. He couldn't sleep or eat or think without her clouding his thoughts. The butterflies were just the beginning. She had been more than good in the sack. She had been perfect.

If he hadn't felt the slight resistance himself, he never would have believed that she was untouched. She responded with so much passion to everything he did to her. He couldn't believe that this perfect virginal girl had let him inside of her—but she had. And he had shown her exactly what she had been missing.

The next morning he had wanted to continue things. He tracked her down only to find that she wanted to forget about the evening they had spent together. She was horrified and ashamed, and if not for the memory of her orgasm and responses, he would have probably let it go. But he knew he satisfied her. And he knew that he wanted to do it again and again.

He purchased the necklace because he wanted to see her smile that perfect smile for him. He knew she'd just broken up with Nate and Nate wouldn't be buying her a birthday gift being too occupied with parental problems. He knew it was a huge gesture, but she was worth it.

Later that day Nate had him flying into a tailspin. Nate wanted her back, but for all the wrong reasons. Chuck had to talk him out of giving that ring to Blair. Blair would be practically _engaged_ to Nate then. Chuck would never have a chance to feel everything he had felt the night before again.

He showed up at her party even though she had uninvited him. He was disappointed to see her walk away to avoid him when he arrived. But he was undeterred. He knew what he wanted and he was going to get it before Nate showed up and ruined everything.

When he confessed what he was feeling to her he didn't know which of them was more astounded. She rejected those feelings but later, after Nate failed her again, she had accepted him.

He had placed the necklace around her neck, hoping that he was somehow reaching her. He didn't know until she reached up to take a hold of his hand that he had.

That night had been just as perfect as the night before.

Just like every time they were together after that had been perfect.

Sex was never a problem with them. She was eager and more than willing to continue their affair. But he, shockingly so, kept wanting more from her. For the first time in his life he wanted a relationship. He wanted to be with _one_ girl, the only girl to ever give him butterflies.

The only girl he had ever loved.

When he walked in to see Blair in Nate's arms he realized that there was only one guy Blair would ever love—and it wasn't Chuck.

After thinking on the painful thoughts of their whirlwind romance, Chuck told his limo driver to take him to the location of an all-night poker game. Nothing like a little bit of gambling to make him forget about Blair for a while.

He drank too much alcohol; lost too much money, and ended up crashed on a couch in the room the game took place at the Five Star.

Sunday morning arrived and Chuck knew he had to get away. He had already called Jessica with his regrets. He wasn't going to the ball. Nothing was keeping him from leaving early for Christmas break.

He snuck in through the service entrance and went straight to his room. He didn't know if anyone would be trying to find him, but he didn't want to run into them anyway. He took a quick nap till two o'clock, showered, dressed, and packed. He was in the limo and on his way to the airport.

It was almost 4:15pm when the limo slowed to a stop. Chuck waited for the driver to get out and open the door for him assuming they had arrived at the airport. Instead, the divider window slid down and the driver glanced back.

"Yes?" Chuck had asked.

"Your father's on the phone," the man said indicating the phone that was installed in the limo. Chuck had never used it because his cell phone was always handy. Bart must not have been able to reach him since Chuck's has been turned off since yesterday.

"Father," Chuck said, picking up the phone.

"Charles," Bart began. "Where are you?"

"Airport, leaving early for Monaco," Chuck responded uninterestingly.

"Turn around," Bart commanded.

"What?" Chuck asked.

"You are escorting Serena Van Der Woodsen to Cotillion tonight," Bart said.

"But…father..." Chuck said. That meant he'd have to see Blair again. He couldn't deal with seeing her, not now.

"There is no arguing. Be there. That's final," Bart said before hanging up.

Chuck looked at the phone in his hand. He had to do what his father said. It wasn't very often he issued orders, but whenever he said "jump" Chuck had to say "how high?"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

So that was how he found himself dressed in a tux, slightly buzzed from a drink or two that he needed for control, and entering The Palace doors to the maddening activity that surrounded the ball. He looked around and saw a few curious glances coming his way. He just shrugged it off; he knew he looked a mess.

He wondered where Serena was—he still couldn't figure out why she called him for this. He was fairly certain that she loathed him.

Then a pair standing at the bottom of the stairs caught his attention. He sucked in a breath. Nate and Blair were there, together. He watched them talk and then winced when she put her hand in his. _Of _course they had come together. He cursed and wanted to go over and make a scene so that little-miss-perfect's Cotillion was really something to die for. She'd want to die if he got in her face in front of all these people and humiliated her for giving it up to him—the things he could tell everyone about her...

But, he didn't do it, evidently he wasn't drunk enough. Instead he turned to leave as abruptly as he had the day before but Serena grabbed him and tugged him along before he got the chance to go far.

"Chuck! Glad you could make it. Right this way please," Serena said. She didn't allow for any stops on the way. He let her lead him along to a bench down a hall. He thought it odd that she would want to get him alone.

She pushed him down on the bench, sat next to him, and took a compact out of her bag. When she took the powder fluff and started towards his face he cringed.

"What the hell are you doing?" he hissed.

"You're a mess and there will be countless pictures taken tonight," Serena explained. She knew that Blair needed him to look somewhat respectable for the photo in the New York Times. "Just shut up and let me."

He rolled his eyes but let her work on him. "How'd you know my shade?"

"Easy. You're so pale and pasty I just picked the lowest number," Serena scoffed in disgust. She really hated being this close to him. And she needed to tell him about Blair and Nate really soon.

She started applying a third layer and opened her mouth to explain but he interrupted.

"You called my father," he said. It was a statement, not a question. He still couldn't figure out why _she'd_ want to go with _him._

"My mother did," Serena snapped.

"For a date with me, hmm?" he smirked. He leaned closer to her and lowered his eyes languorously. Blair was with Nate. Chuck had lost. If he was forced to attend this little shindig, he was going to make sure he attended it as himself—well, his self before he fell for Blair.

Serena looked at him in disgust. "Careful C, you remember what happened the last time you tried to put the moves on me," she spit out. _God, why was she doing this?_ She thought. _Blair, how could you possibly want _this?

"I'd have done it again much sooner if I knew you were so interested in a second go round," he leered at her and moved closer.

Serena pulls back and tries to explain one more time…

"I guess you haven't told him yet," Blair's voice sounded in the hall. Serena and Chuck's heads swiveled to look at her. Blair glared at Serena, then Chuck.

"And to think I thought you could change," Blair's voice rang out harshly to Chuck.

Chuck just smirked. He didn't know what her problem was, and he didn't care. He definitely wasn't going to change for her now that she had ditched him.

"Why would I? _You_ can't. Running back to Nate the second he snaps his fingers. Go back to your little bitch B. I'm busy here," he reached his arm around Serena and dragged her close.

Serena pushed out of his arms and stood up, "Blair…" she began.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Blair said in her lost little girl voice to Serena before turning and walking as fast as she could down the hall and back to the ball. Her skirt was hindering her efforts at speed, but she continued as fast as she could.

Serena watched her leave with regret. She hadn't told Blair about Chuck trying to take advantage of her. She hadn't wanted to especially when she realized that Blair actually had feelings for Chuck. She turned around. Before he knew what she was about to do, she drew back her hand and slapped him.

He sprang to his feet and grabbed her arm, dragging her close to him. "I knew you'd like it rough."

"Stop it! You are such an idiot!" Serena yelled, pushing him away. He just laughed and tried to pull her close again.

"She chose you!" Serena said through clenched teeth as she struggled against him. It took him a minute to realize what she had said. Then he paused and looked at her in confusion.

"She chose you! Nate kissed her! She didn't want him to. You just assumed and you were wrong!" Serena glared at him.

Chuck's hands dropped to his sides as her words slammed into his brain. Then he reached a hand up to the side of his head as if it pained him before he slumped back down on the bench.

Serena huffed and continued the story that she was supposed to say earlier but had been interrupted until it was too late.

"She's been trying to find you for the past twenty-four hours! She was worried that your _feelings_ were hurt. You're here to be _her_ escort, not mine," she said in disgust. "She chose you and she was willing to let everyone see that."

He put his elbows on his knees and bowed forward, rubbing his hands through his hair, unable to believe what was happening.

Serena paused in her story, watching him act so uncharacteristically. He really looked devastated. The fact that he had stopped mauling her when he heard her words was one thing, but to see how much Blair really affected him was quite another.

"You really do have feelings for her, don't you?" Serena asked.

He didn't respond. He dropped his hands to the side and swung his head to look down the hall in the direction Blair had just left. A look of determination came across his face and he stood up to go after her.

"Chuck, stop," Serena put her hand up, walking in front of him. "Let me."

He looked at her in confusion. He didn't understand why she would help him after what he just did.

She just shook her head, "It will be much safer for women everywhere if you're with Blair." With that she turned and walked down the hall.

He looked after her before following her. He wanted to see what would happen. Could Serena calm Blair down and get her to forgive him for behaving the way he had? He didn't know, but he was going to watch their exchange so he could intercede if Serena failed.

_To be continued…_


	9. Chapter 9

"Blair!" Serena said, finally catching up with her and grabbing her arm.

Blair turned to look at Serena with tears in her eyes that she was struggling very hard to hold back. She needed to maintain her composure now more than ever. She was about to officially debut as a lady. She just had to get away from Serena and go up those stairs.

"That's why you hate him so much," Blair said softly. She had walked in just in time to hear Serena mention something that happened the last time Chuck tried to come on to her.

Serena sighed, "B! Snap out of it!" she exclaimed. "You _know_ how Chuck is…or was…or whatever. That didn't stop you from starting something up with him. Just talk to him."

Blair blinked. "You're here to…_help_ him?" She could hardly believe it. Serena had just done a complete turnaround.

"I think you're right. He does care," Serena said before rushing through the rest. "I think he saw you with Nate again when he got here and in his sick Chuck Bass way he decided to get back at you for rejecting him. I think he really was hurt."

Her eyes pleaded with Blair to go back and talk to Chuck. Serena just wanted Blair to be happy. Blair had been betrayed one too many times by the people she loved. Blair deserved something good to happen to her…even if it _was_ with Chuck Bass.

Blair took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She knew what Serena said was true but all she kept seeing was Chuck with Serena. Why did it have to be S? It had been hard enough after Nate, but Chuck too? In some small part of her mind she knew that Serena was right. Chuck knew that Serena would hurt her the most.

She didn't want to deal with this or these feelings right now. She was too overwhelmed. Her courage was completely gone. There was no way she was going to walk up those stairs in front of all her friends and debut with Chuck Bass at her side. She couldn't trust him after what he'd done.

"And the next time? And the time after that? Who's to say what he'll do the next time we have a little spat or misunderstanding? He trusts me about as much as I trust him," she said.

"B…just talk to him," Serena pleaded. "Don't you want to try to work this out? After everything you've been through?"

Blair sucked in a breath and let it out. "If _you_ think he's changed so much, _you_ be his date. Carter's mine." With that, she turned and walked towards the stairs again.

"B…" Serena said, but she didn't follow Blair.

Chuck was watching by the hall entrance. He couldn't hear what was being said, but he knew that Serena had failed when Blair turned away and raced to the stairs again.

"Shit," he hissed, before going after her himself. He didn't know if anything he said would help this situation, but he had to try.

* * *

Meanwhile, Nate was in his spot on the stairs. He had gone straight there after his talk with Blair. He felt better knowing that she wasn't completely wiping him out of her life. He even sheltered a small hope that she would one day turn to him again, but for now he'd take what he could get.

He looked over at the girl he was escorting. He found it ironic that he had come to the ball with Chuck's date. He hadn't really wanted to go after the mess with Blair, but Jessica needed a date and he was free. He did feel bad that she was forced to find a new date because he'd beaten the crap out of hers.

A motion out of the corner of his eye had him looking to see Blair start up the stairs and walk right past him. She wasn't looking at anything and she seemed to be holding onto her composure by a thread. No one else would be able to tell how upset she was but years of being with her told him that she was close to losing it. _What was going on?_

He looked down the stairs again and saw Chuck hurrying through the crowd of people for the stairs. He realized that Chuck must have done something to hurt Blair. Things were starting to look up for Nate. But first, he had to protect Blair. If she wanted to be away from Chuck, who was he to not grant her wish?

As Chuck drew close, Nate reached out and grabbed his arm. Chuck was startled and tried to pull his arm away. Nate held on hard. "Leave her alone."

Chuck sucked in a breath when he realized who was holding onto him. He drew back his free arm and punched Nate across the cheekbone. Nate had to let go to grab onto the banister or he would have fallen.

People around them gasped and realized that the bruises they'd noticed on both of Nate's and Chuck's faces were inflicted by each other instead of the result of them fighting together against some unknown assailant—like the gossip mill had originally assumed.

Chuck didn't spare Nate or the spectators a second glance, he just kept going up.

"Blair!" he shouted.

Conversations around him dimmed as the single name he said reached the people on the stairs. Their friends were staring in shock at him as they slowly connected the dots. Nate and Chuck had fought, and it looked like they were fighting over…_Blair_? But that would mean…_B_? She had some explaining to do.

Blair had frozen on the step at his shout. She turned around to face him, completely composed with all traces of tears gone. She waited, along with everyone else, to see what he would say.

"I'm sorry," he confessed loudly.

Everyone around him gasped. Chuck Bass did not apologize for _any_thing. He never showed remorse. Serena, from the bottom of the stairs, and Nate, clenching his hand on the staircase, stared at his back in shock. They couldn't believe that Chuck had just revealed before God and society that Blair had him whipped.

Everyone turned to look at Blair.

She looked around at her friends and saw the look of amazed disgust on their faces. Whether she got out of this situation with her reputation intact depended on her response. She looked back at him and closed down completely. She couldn't do it.

Emotionlessly she responded, "So am I." With those words she dismissed Chuck and turned around to finish the walk to her spot.

Chuck stared at her back, feeling his stomach drop and pain race through him harsher than his fight with Nate. He'd lost. She really wasn't going to forgive him. He sucked in a deep breath and finally noticed everyone standing around him.

The guys were trying hard not to look at him but he could tell he'd just lost all respect they had for him as the prime player on the scene. The girls were either trying to hide their giggles behind their hands, sending texts with cell phones that he couldn't figure out where they hid them on their gowns, grinning because he'd gotten what he deserved, or snapping pictures to send to Gossip Girl to depict Chuck Bass' ultimate fall and humiliation.

He dropped his head and turned to start walking back down the stairs as the whispers around him grew louder.

* * *

Carter had watched everything with a slight smile, finally understanding why she'd asked him all those questions earlier.

She settled into her spot across from him on the stairs standing stiff, straight, and emotionless. He didn't know what prompted him to say what he did next—maybe it was to make up for cheating Nate at gambling and stealing from Chuck. He had been meaning to make amends. He didn't need his past mistakes coming back to bite him in the ass.

"Blair?" he asked softly. She snapped her head up to glare at him. She wasn't in the mood for friendly talk.

"No regrets," he said. It wasn't a question. It was a statement. It was the only thing he could think to say. He didn't have any regrets over leaving. He wanted to make sure she knew that if she did this, she should make sure she would never regret it. There was no turning back.

For a moment he thought she was just going to ignore what he'd said. Then slowly her eyes filled with tears and she gasped like she had been holding her breath for a long time. She sniffed and walked out into the middle of the stairs again, facing down them.

She saw him walking down the stairs slowly. She saw the looks on the faces of everyone smirking at him. She couldn't stand it. In the next heartbeat she forgave him.

"Chuck!" she shouted this time.

He froze and everyone was looking at her now. He slowly turned around.

She took a deep breath and hesitantly reached out her arm—unsure if he would accept it.

He looked startled before he realized that she was actually giving his worthless hide another chance. He didn't think twice before going up the stairs and taking the hand she offered to him.

"Are you sure?" he whispered for her ears only.

Her eyes twinkled as she remembered the first time he'd ever asked her that question. She nodded and leaned forward and kissed him in front of God, society, the world, and all her friends. She wanted him and she was done hiding it.

He kissed her back hungrily, holding her close, never wanting to let her go.

All around them flashes flickered on the oblivious couple as picture after picture joined the crush on their way to Gossip Girl's webpage.

* * *

"Blair Cornelia Waldorf, daughter of Harold and Eleanor Waldorf, escorted by Charles Bass." Blair and Chuck smiled at each other.

"Plans to be a member of Yale's class of 2013. She will continue to summer in South Hampton and volunteer her time to children's charities," the spokeswoman announced.

There was a tittering of applause as Blair put her arm through Chuck's and they ascended the second flight of stairs.

CeCe looked on, gleeful about the entire thing. Not only did Serena have a suitable escort, but her forever perfect best friend shined just a little bit less today, which allowed Serena to shine as the lady CeCe wanted everyone to see her as.

She gave a sly smirk to Blair and Chuck as they walked by her to the second landing before she turned back to watch her granddaughter being presented.

"And now I'd like to present Serena Celia Van Der Woodsen, daughter of Committee Member Lillian Van Der Woodsen and granddaughter of Committee Member _Ameritus_ Celia Rose. Serena plans to bed as many billionaires as possible before settling down to…"

Everyone around the hall tried to control their laughter, a few snickers could be heard. Serena and Carter grinned and tried to hold back their giggles, barely. CeCe's mouth dropped open in shock, completely scandalized, and she frowned when she heard especially loud snickers and laughs behind her.

She looked up and saw Chuck and Blair giving her matching smirks.

_Dear Lord,_ she thought,_ they really were meant for each other._

* * *

Everyone had been dancing for hours, the shock and excitement of the evening almost gone.

After Serena's less than stellar debut, she had a confrontation with her mother about the changes to her statement. She had gone back to the dance floor to join Carter after that and Lily had gone to secretly get Dan. Serena and Carter ended up talking about old times while dancing and he eventually mentioned her grandmother calling him the week before.

Serena confronted her grandmother; Dan showed up; S & D made up and were now dancing to a slow song near Blair and Chuck.

Blair caught Serena's eye and they both smiled at each other.

Blair glanced around again and saw that Carter was now dancing with Jessica. She wondered briefly where Nate had gone, but then she put him out of her mind.

She looked up at the guy holding her and running his fingers up and down her back. All thoughts of Nate disappeared.

She stopped trying to do one of the fancy dances she had trained for and just snuggled up against his shoulder, sighing contently and listening to the song swelling around them.

_You want one true lover with a thousand kisses  
You want soft and gentle and never vicious  
And __the__n one you're saving for a rainy day  
If your lover ever takes her love away_

She didn't know if this was love. She'd been so wrong with Nate. She thought it was too soon to feel anything like that with Chuck…and she was scared to be so wrapped up in another person the way she had been with Nate. It was unhealthy really and made her jealous and possessive. She knew that it was okay that she didn't know her feelings though. Chuck was discovering these new feelings too. Maybe they could learn together. She didn't know if this was love, but she knew she cared about him…and she knew he made her happy.

The lyrics made her smile and think of the priest she'd spoken to the day before. She gave a little laugh.

"What's the joke?" Chuck asked.

"Nothing…" she smiled, "Just thinking that I'll save my third wish for later." She knew where to find her genie if she needed him again.

Chuck raised an eyebrow and gave her a perplexed look. She just laughed and snuggled up to his shoulder again.

"Want to get out of here?" he whispered, reveling in the feel of her. He still couldn't quite grasp how perfectly everything worked out. He'd mentioned something to Blair about it earlier but she'd just given him some drivel about doing something good in a past life—whatever that meant.

"How about a limo ride?" she teased him.

He gave her his best devilish grin and they walked out of the hall with all the grace they could muster.

* * *

E . P . I . L . O . G . U . E .

The newspaper smacked down on the table in front of him.

"Have you seen this?" his mother asked.

He looked at the paper. The New York Times, Fashion & Style, section F1, the story title read _Night Out with Blair Waldorf._

The caption beneath the picture read _Blair Waldorf and Charles Bass_.

Nate was amazed at how clear Chuck's face looked. He must have put more cover up on before taking the picture.

Nate looked up at his mother and nodded.

"Some friend he turned out to be," she said. She still held out hope of him getting back together with Blair. She really liked her and had always thought she would one day be her daughter-in-law.

Nate thought back to the night before and why he'd left so early. Now he understood why Blair glowed—she was happy. She was far happier than she'd ever been with him. Chuck had done that.

Chuck had humiliated himself for her, completely destroying his reputation in the process. Nate knew deep down that Chuck would be better for being with her too. It was just so hard to admit it.

Nate had made some colossal mistakes in the past year. He'd lost so much. It was too late—he was always so _late!_—to go back…or was it? He thought about everything and finally responded to his mother.

"Yes. He _is_ a good friend," he said.

His mom just gave him an odd look before leaving the room.

Nate tossed the paper down and rested his elbows on the table. He sighed.

Maybe he'd call Chuck to get a drink later.


End file.
